http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zqt0qB-XQNI&feature=related

When the wind takes you

You look at me with uncertainty,
You look at me with urgency.
You look at me with fear in your eyes
Like you're about to fall away.

But don't be afraid to change your colours now.
I've known you all Summer, and you rose above it all.
I see you hesitate to fall now,
But it's a pretty good view from down here, too.

And when the wind takes you, it takes me, too.
When you change colours, I change mine, too.
Try not to think, and I will try to.
When you let go, I will let go, too.

I knew you when you were green and strong.
You were like a feather on a wing, so long.
You know I will miss you when you are gone,
But don't be afraid if you just can't hang on.

'Cause when the wind takes you, it takes me, too.
When you change colours, I change mine, too.
Try not to think and I will try, too.
And when you let go, I will let go, too.

The cold air is pushing hard on you.
I know what you're saying; I can feel it, too.
You'll go through changes, and I'll go through them too.
Don't be afraid now, don't be afraid.

'Cause when the wind takes you, it takes me, too.
When you change colours, I change mine, too.
Try not to think and I will try, too.
And when you let go, I will let go, too

I hear you calling, I will stay strong

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-TPWr0roLY

Selah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSUA_E0Ce4A&feature=related

My first autumn without you, and this was so much our special time. Today was so beautiful, one of those heartwrenching Gatineau Hills fall days where the intensity of the light is almost unbearable.. the Merlin soared around us, various huge ravens that are always nearby...the air so cold and crisp and life feeling just..perfect, as it is. except for the missing shape, the one laways beside me as far back as I can recall..and the one most present now is yours.Dan, Tina and I walked through the back, she was wearing Luke's harness. I felt you all around and through me, everything you taught me, all the strengths you brought out in me, all the transformations my loving you so much entailed. And I looked at Tina rolling on her back in the grass, wagging her tail with bemused delight to be free and alive and in this holy place, and I know I am only able to do things like rescue now because YOU showed me how much love I really have inside. She would be dead without you, without the love you gave me that I now can pass on. She was never adored and cared for like you were, her bad condition shows that, and then to just leave her alone in that shelter...aren't you happy somwehere, smiling your dear little wise smile, knowing we did this, you and me, we took her home, we give her some of the joy we shared when you were here.

Oh, but I miss you, my litlest angel..and the fall is a terrible time to be engulfed in sadness. We do carry on endeavoring to be happy. Christmas is yet to be faced.
Mommy loves lila - always love Lila, so much love my Bo.

Just to let you know we are ok, we are strong,and we know you are here.

If I Could Be Where You Are

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4uI-jrIxog&feature=related

Where are you this moment?
Only in my dreams.
You're missing, but you're always
A heartbeat from me.
I'm lost now without you,
I don't know where you are.
I keep watching, I keep hoping,
But time keeps us apart

[chorus]
Is there a way I can find you,
Is there a sign I should know,
Is there a road I could follow,
To bring you back home?

Winter lies before me
Now you're so far away
In the darkness of my dreaming
The light of you will stay

If I could be close beside you
If I could be where you are
If I could reach out and touch you
And bring you back home
Is there a way I can find you,
Is there a sign I should know,
Is there a road I could follow,
To bring you back home to me

xoxo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z97_bH_dwc4



How I needed you
How I grieve now you're gone
In my dreams I see you
I awake so alone

I know you didn't want to leave
Your heart yearned to stay
But the strength I always loved in you
Finally gave way

Somehow I knew you would leave me this way
Somehow I knew you could never, never stay
And in the early morning light
After a silent peaceful night
You took my heart away
And my being

In my dreams I can see you
I can tell you how I feel
In my dreams I can hold you
And it feels so real

I still feel the pain
I still feel your love
I still feel the pain
I still feel your love

And somehow I knew you could never, never stay
And somehow I knew you would leave me
And in the early morning light
After a silent peaceful night
You took my heart away
Oh I wish, I wish you could have stayed

The concept of Lila signifies Freedom

Lila (Sanskrit: लीला), or Leela is a concept within Hinduism literally meaning "pastime", "sport" or "play". It is common to both monistic and dualistic philosophical schools, but has a markedly different significance in each. Within monism, Lila is a way of describing all reality, including the cosmos, as the outcome of creative play by the divine absolute (Brahman). In the dualistic schools of Vaishnavism, Lila more simply refers to the activities of God and his devotees, as distinct from the common activities of karma.

It was a long time ago the name came to me, and I always pronounced it L- EYE-la. In Sanskrit it is Leela. but you always meant sacred play, to me, you little minx. Even when I found that L-EYE-la meant "dark as night" in Hebrew, and that you were too.

Your role in my life was definitely the "activities of God" however one understands that concept.


You loved me in all my aspects; me the religionist, the academic, as well as the Irishwoman, overemotional, a little crazy, and you loved the silly me, the serious me, the girly me - any me that smelled like me, and you never let me down. Worth 2000 of most humans I know who drop others like a hot potato once it becomes inconvenient! You understood respect as well as love, humour as well as sensitivity, and you never questioned me directly, although a few choice looks would tell me you were not fully appreciating whatever I was doing at the moment.

I miss you so much, Bo. I know you are getting back here as quickly as you can. I heard you last night...what a lambie dog you are.
I have saved all your lambs so you can play with hem again, when you get here. Dan almost got your goat the other day, but it was like he knew he shouldnt destroy it, so he just carried it around a while.


SO much love Lila!!

Ram Shanker Misra in "The Integral Advaitism of Sri Aurobindo" -

"Brahman is full of all perfections. And to say that Brahman has some purpose in creating the world will mean that it wants to attain through the process of creation something which it has not. And that is impossible. Hence, there can be no purpose of Brahman in creating the world. The world is a mere spontaneous creation of Brahman. It is a Lila, or sport, of Brahman. It is created out of Bliss, by Bliss and for Bliss. Lila indicates a spontaneous sportive activity of Brahman as distinguished from a self-conscious volitional effort. The concept of Lila signifies freedom as distinguished from necessity."

I miss school. I miss the Religion department. I miss feeling centered. But more than anything I can think of, I miss you.

What a lambie-dog you are.
Th concept of Lila signifies freedom.


Find me soon, please. Dan and I are like two old chickens here. We need the rainbow! We need the balance.
We need the freedom.

Mom